That was how my pool session today came to an abrupt end. The power went off and we had to evacuate Pioneer Pool here in Christchurch.
Now as you know I am all for being honest here, and to be honest hauling my fat arse to the pool has been the last thing I have felt like doing since I returned from Sydney, however I have been twice in 3 days so doing ok. My programme has increased and I am now doing 400metres without stopping 1200 in total per session. Due to today's "swimmus interuptus" I only managed 1000 before being forced to evacuate, as the wonderful Debbie said on Facebook maybe that is the universes way of saying "enough for today".
In the spirit of honesty I have been riding around on the sugar wagon as well for nearly a week, man can I feel it, so sluggish and lethargic as well. So even though my logical brain says, "cut the fructose out you numbskull", my willpower and tastebuds are going "Ahhh F*** it, just eat that shit, who cares anyway?" So really who does care??? Do I really care? That is what I am wondering at the moment as I struggle with the monumental fact that in order to feel happy, healthy and well I need to shed at least 50kg and swim shark infested waters in a country on the other side of the world. What the hell was I thinking?
Yes I do care, because I know that there are one or two of you out there who read this, you have offered encouragement and even embarked on your own Funk Busting quest. So even though letting myself down is incredibly easy, because I let myself off to lightly, I suspect that you may not let me off. So onwards and upwards I go, I will re climb that SUGAR FREE wagon and keep hitting the pool and show you all that anything is doable regardless of how huge and scary it may seem. This accountability stuff is pretty good, so keep on keeping me accountable, and I wont let you (or me) down.
On another note, so far this week my motivation has been in my boots and yesterday I spent most of the day in my room just doing nothing. A few hours writing for a small contract I have was about it, I just closed myself away. This is not good and I must not make this a habit.
Those of you that know me know I have just finished a contract doing a great job and am basically a free agent. I have done a little bit of contract work, however I am basically looking for the next opportunity to show itself. This is kind of tricky at the moment because my confidence and self-esteem took a major hammering over the last few months, and I often will shy away from something that may be good for me.
Sometimes it seems a culture where talking, thinking, procrastinating, back patting, bullying and slow progress is acceptable and rewarded behavior, for me that is counter productive to my own mental health. I am the kind of person who will innovate, plan, strategise, problem-solve, TAKE ACTION, review, hold accountable and be accountable so I am hoping like hell there is a place for me out there in the professional world as at the moment I feel like I am all alone and being punished for being passionate.
One thing I know for sure is that I am a great fixer, present me with a problem and I will find you a solution, whether you accept it and take action or not is entirely up to you, but I will find a way to the light at the end of the tunnel.So I am looking at ways to utilise these skills to possibly start a new business. I need to finance this funk busting somehow.
Also I have relaunched my book "The Accidental Organiser" so I am selling copies of that to make a little bit of money as well, also I sent my CV to a local talk back radio station yesterday that may need a new breakfast host, and told them I was worth a shot. So I am out there and on the hunt for amazing opportunities to make a difference and help finance this amazing funk busting journey.
Now to work on the self esteem..............See you soon and keep busting your funk.
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